Yesterday then was my final day at White Rabbit Press, bringing to an end what has been a very interesting 7 months of employment there. I won’t dwell on that now – perhaps let a little time go by before publicly reflecting and drawing conclusions. I will say though that is was just what I needed at that time, and played a key role in propelling me onwards and upwards.

So we’re now faced with a big blank sheet of paper, upon which I’m trying to sketch out the life that I’d like to create. Free from the ties of a full-time desk job, I now have the flexibility to design a new lifestyle that sees me really make the most of my time and talents. A major element of this plan is of course the need to generate revenue for our family. However, in this case, the means to do that is already in place, and does not dictate where or when I work. Provided I have this MacBook Pro and an Internet connection, we’re cool. Admittedly, a desk or table would also be handy (more on that in due course).

So it’s not necessarily the details I need to work on, it’s the big picture. Who is Joseph Tame and what does he do? Where does he want to be in 5 years time? What are his areas of expertise? How big does he dare dream? Decide upon these and it becomes clearer where the focus needs to be, and from there it’s possible to map out what specific steps need to be taken now.

When I had a full time job it was easier to ignore these questions. My identity was partly taken care of by the company – with what I did making up who I was.

Hi, I’m Joseph Tame. I’m Marketing Director at White Rabbit Press.

Take away the protection of the job title, and suddenly, it’s all about you.

Hi, I’m Joseph Tame.

On day 1 of being Joseph Tame, I’m feeling a little intimidated.

The intimidation comes from sensing great potential. This is something that has been a consistent undercurrent through my life these past 10 years, this feeling that I am barely scratching the surface when it comes to using my full potential. I have a strong desire to make a difference in the world.

And whilst I celebrate small achievements, and don’t regard them as any less valuable than large achievements, I can’t deny that ultimately I want to do something Big. Very big. Something global in scale that touches millions.

And I think this is where the fear stems from. Here I am, being offered a clean slate upon which to sketch out my life, and there’s that potential standing on the horizon saying “Hiah! Hey, Joseph! I know you can see me! Can’t hide behind that job title anymore!”

Yeah, it’s kind of difficult to ignore.

What makes it even more difficult to ignore is that friends and family around me reinforce this feeling. They offer encouragement and express their belief in me. They’re excited for me, they want me to go for it. Damn it, why do I have to have so many open-minded positive people around me?!!

So what is it I need to do? I think I’m the only one that can answer that, albeit with the help of those around me.

I can’t keep on running away forever.

5 Responses

  1. Personally, I’m more a fan of “thinking small”. I’d rather meaningfully touch a hundred people than concern myself with millions. Very few people have the capacity to connect on that level unless they invent something of value to the world (like a method for clean water which can be used anywhere with minimal equipment and energy). Perhaps the goal is overwhelming for you because it’s a bit unrealistic for anyone, not just you personally. And that doesn’t diminish you to say that, but reflects the lack of universal values. You can’t appeal to everyone because what appeals to each person is too varied.

    I’d recommend that you satisfy you first, and the rest will come. Do what is creatively fulfilling and people will share you passion as reflected in your work.

    1. Thanks for your comment.

      When writing this I was thinking about the last time I posted on this theme, and linked to an article celebrating thinking small. Can’t find it right now.

      Mmm. Maybe I’ll end up thinking medium!

  2. Joseph, long time no see. Guess that’s partly because there hasn’t been a lot happening on the Daily Mumble lately…

    Something struck me about this latest development (leaving WRP after seven months) – you seem to be constantly running from “conformity”. As if by having a job (and, consequently, a job title) somehow boxes you in to being something you don’t want to be. You initially didn’t go to university because you perceived it to represent “conformity” – only years later did you come to appreciate the true value of “conforming”. I would hazard a guess and say that you’d class those years as the most valuable of your life, right?

    Well, I feel that your attitude to the world of work is very similar to that young man who didn’t feel university was “for him”. Despite what you may hear in those self-help books/seminars/podcasts etc, doing a job does not equate to being shafted by The Man forever more. I have no idea what your latest initiative is but I’m beginning to fear that this unshakeable anti-conformist stance and impossibly grand dreams are leading to a never-ending series of false-starts and disappointment. I thought WRP might be the start of a PROCESS to finding a position that is perfect for you, but you seem to have given up without so much as second thought.

    Maybe I’ll be proved wrong and you’ll go on to something truly extraordinary (and I honestly hope that I will be) but I can’t shake the feeling that this could be a case of history repeating itself…

    1. Anonymous, hisashiburi indeed.

      There’s a lot more to what’s going on in my life than is written here. Bear in mind that this is but a snapshot of some elements of my life I choose to share. If it’s any reassurance though, I see the way things are going as natural progression – it’s all working out wonderfully 🙂

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